“Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)
Perpetually plagued, until we go home, that is one way to look at it. Non-stop trials, never-ending lusts, berating ourselves, seeing little value in our service to Him no matter what that service is.
Can you think of any cares that you have in this life that cannot be carried by the Lord, sickness, doubt, death, all are nothing to Him to whom all things are possible, we know this, we trust in Him implicitly, we live our lives as best as we know how in service to the Most High, and then we have a thought of lust, of anger toward those we love, of desires that should not enter into our minds, and that is in just the first minute after we open our eyes from a nights rest.
The battle is fierce, even when we attempt our best to divert our attention back to where it should be, on seeking the face of God, we wander in our thoughts.
Which of you has not had a thought or image pass through your mind that should not be there even when you are reading the Word of God? “O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?” (Romans 7:24) We cast them at the feet of the Lord Jesus Christ, find relief for a moment, and then they return, we are perpetually plagued.
One of the greatest problems with those who have been crucified with Christ are these thoughts, thoughts that rarely if ever come to fruition with actions, but nevertheless plague us nearly constantly, and we berate ourselves continuously for them. “I can’t be saved, no Christian would ever have these desires, these thoughts.” Our Adamic nature may have indeed been crucified with Christ, we are indeed dead to them, “For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace.” (Romans 6:14) but there is a shadow, a lingering presence that will not be removed until we are glorified, and we must adjust our new life in Christ accordingly.
“Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.” (Romans 6:4)
If you can comprehend this poorly written letter, then you can agree with it when I call it a battle, a perpetual plague, for it vexes us nearly constantly. We hate it and seek after it at the same time, we abhor it with every fiber of our being, and find at the same time a desire to continue in them. You will lust after that which is against the will of God, that old man inside of us, our old nature may have been crucified that day with Christ, but he dies slowly, and screams constantly.
“Blessed and holy is he that hath part in the first resurrection: on such the second death hath no power, but they shall be priests of God and of Christ, and shall reign with him a thousand years.” (Rev. 20:6)
That second death, those that refuse to acknowledge Jesus Christ as Lord in this life, that will be cast for all eternity into the Lake of Fire, will never know respite or relief from those carnal desires, but even worse, they will never be able to fulfill those desires. That is a burning fire that few speak about, because it is beyond horrific. To have desires and never be able to attain them.
Sometimes, not always of course, but sometimes those cares that we cast upon the Lord seem rather meaningless when that perspective comes into our thoughts.
Isn’t it amazing, to those of us who lived a good portion of our lives in great sin and open rebellion to the Lord now ponder at length how a single thought can cause us to feel shame in His presence, to make us feel as if we have been deceiving ourselves all this time. We would no more return to the pigsty and seek the husks than we would dishonor Him by even contemplating it, yet that old man in us keeps screaming, hanging up there on that cross, begging us to return to the world.
These cares are real, they are tangible to us, we want that which we no longer want. One day that old nature will not just be silenced, it will be gone, never to return, our thoughts will be freed from its constant plague. Until then, hold fast to Jesus Christ, fight the good fight.
“Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised;)” (Heb. 10:23)
