Are you exhibiting self-control, or are you Spirit led? Do you search the Scriptures to find all the commandments, the rules and regulations that you think you are to follow, or are you Christlike in your nature? Is your character and integrity one of an outstanding and upstanding man of the world, or are you despised and rejected by mankind?
I fear that most people cannot comprehend the difference, they seem to think that politeness, an outward appearance that reflects if not the best of the world, then at least one that is not in opposition to it is the way of the Christian walk, they speak, look and represent themselves as one whom others want to be around for they are like them. They will in no way offend, not even for the cause of Christ, they have decided that self-control for the better impression of themselves towards and in the eyes of others is the best path towards a form of holiness. “Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy.” (1 Peter 1:16)
It does not mean having the same haircut as everyone else, it does not mean dressing appropriately for the occasion, it does not mean always putting the right foot forward, it means being Christlike, and that should be quite evident from the Scriptures.
Those who have determined to follow Jesus are not overly concerned with people’s feelings, they are concerned with their souls, they understand the expression of love both in words and deeds, but they will not negate the task that has been laid at their feet, to reach others for the glory of God. They are not the gatekeepers, so to speak, it is not their responsibility to search out the sins of those they meet, “But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.” (1 Cor. 9:27) But when it is encountered, they are to address it, not pass it by as if unnoticed. “Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.” (James 4:17)
Good is caring for the souls of the lost and encouraging the brethren when they have encountered a hardship in their life. Good is not only speaking up about evil, blatant sins, but is doing all that it is led to do to bring them into the light. Everyone has been blessed with free will, it is not our place to tell them how to live, but it is ours to inform them that they are making the wrong choice, that the wrath of God is upon the wicked, (John 3:36) and that there will be an eternal consequence to their actions.
Our self-control, if it favors the accolades and recognition from those in this world, is at odds with the Holy Spirit, it affords the Lord none of the glory due Him for our lives and instead focuses all attention on us. “From men which are thy hand, O LORD, from men of the world, which have their portion in this life, and whose belly thou fillest with thy hid treasure: they are full of children, and leave the rest of their substance to their babes.” (Psalm 17:14)
There is only one point in our lives that must affect our walk, and it is not about what others think of us, it is what they think of Christ. Here is where the church has fallen in this area, they preach love and acceptance of all, but not reproving and correcting in that same love, they teach never offending, no matter the sin, but not using the sword of the Spirit, (Eph. 6:17) the Word of God to rebuke those who profess Christ but cannot be distinguished from those in the world. They teach self-control, but not for the glory of God through submission to the will of the Holy Spirit.
They have been trapped by a love that is not of the Almighty, but is the semblance of the world’s idea of love.
Self -control is indeed one of the fruits of the Spirit, (Gal. 5:22-23) but it never seeks its own, its only desire is to see the Lord glorified, and that looks nothing like what the world thinks it should resemble, much less what many who are professing Christ today believe it to be.